Tuesday, April 1, 2008

April 1st

I haven't posted in a little while and I actually wasn't going to post today but decided that I would just to vent a little of the emotion that is fogging up my brain. Today is April's 1st, the day of fools for so many people. I used to love this day but 16 years ago on this day, the only grandmother that I had ever known passed away. I was only 15.

I find it odd that since that day I have never celebrated April Fool's Day. I have never played a trick or been sarcastic on this day (about the only day of the year when I am not sarcastic). I'm not grieving anymore for my grandmother but I do feel a sense of melancholy every year on this day.

Today was no different than any of the other years and it really creates an understanding of how important a person can be if you still miss them 16 years after they have been gone. Maybe if I could go and visit Lynn Valley, the place where her ashes are spread, the melancholy wouldn't affect me as much but I live over 3000 miles from Lynn Valley now and that isn't an easy trip to make anymore.

Instead, I went for a drive and watched the water rising in the river (there was a lot of snow this year so it looks like there may be flooding) and I got a little work done but not as much as I wanted to. Oh well, there is always tomorrow and from what I understand, it will be bright and shining with spring sunshine trickling between the bare branches of the trees surrounding my home. Tomorrow the melancholy will pass for another year and maybe next year will be the first time in 16 years that I can truly enjoy April Fool's.

Until tomorrow,

Sirena

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