Sirena Van Schaik

10 Years Ago Today

2011-08-11T09:18:00.003-04:00

Ten years ago today, I gave birth to a beautiful little boy. I loved him from the moment that I saw him and while I was overjoyed at being a mother, I didn't cry. For years, that fact bothered me and I often wondered what type of mother I was. I felt as if I was lacking in some area or other because I hadn't cried at the pure joy that becoming a mother was. I had seen it on countless

The Shark

2011-08-08T01:00:00.001-04:00

Another story that I wrote when I was 15 at the direction of my creative writing course. One thing that I should mention is that much of the writing that I did when I was 15 and 16 was because my teacher, Marilyn, had inspired me or asked me to write it. I remember giving her a story about Death and she began to cry when she read it. She asked to show it to one of her collegues and I never saw

The Lotus Part Four

2011-08-07T01:00:00.000-04:00

You faded from my sight and I gathered by the shore, longing to see you once again. Hoping that I had simply missed you in my passing. You hadn't disappeared but had drifted out of sight as many things have done in the past. It was to no avail, you are gone and as the days drifted by I stop searching for you, although I remember the vibrancy of your petals. I search the water for other flowers

Wolf Dream

2011-08-06T01:00:00.001-04:00

Moonlight trickles into the room and I watch it play along my wall casting images that make my heart beat quickly. I turn away from it, from the shadows that are terrifying to me. My eyes try to peer through the darkness of the rest of my room but the shadows are too thick and I close my eyes to block out the imagined monsters lurking there.The air in the room presses against me and I struggle

Poems from a 16 Year Old

2011-08-05T01:00:00.001-04:00

As I did a few days ago, I thought I would post another one of my blast from the past poems that I found. I wrote these when I was 16 and you can tell that I had all the teen angst stuff down. I also had a bit of a negative view on the world if I don't say so myself.Untitled Poem #1:Life cameThenThe terror of DeathLifeThrough pain was destroyedDeathWas always waitingToFill a LifeAChild's Life

Learn!

2011-08-04T01:00:00.000-04:00

As I mentioned a few days ago, I have decided to start moving forward by giving myself some goals. I have found that it is very easy to stop. To begin to stagnate and enjoy the status quo. There is nothing new, nothing that really changes but instead of moving forward, you start to simply accept it. You forget that life can be more than the daily routine.Over the last three years, I have

The Pack

2011-08-03T01:00:00.001-04:00

Whiteness. That's all I remember for much of that night. Just the white that covered the road, the van and all the other vehicles on the highway. It hung in the air and when you opened the window, it invaded your throat making you gasp at the iciness of it. It was a strange winter storm for the lower mainland in British Columbia but it wasn't unheard of. What was unheard of, was the fact that I

The Lotus Part 3

2011-08-02T01:00:00.001-04:00

Silence fills the world around us and I focus on your beauty. Is it me or is your beauty fading? I wonder if it will last until tomorrow or if I will come down the stairs and find you gone; your secrets disappearing with you. But that is for tomorrow and today I capture your silence with my lens; your secrets still hidden away. The kids say that you are mine but you remain out of reach from me.

Birds of a Feather

2011-08-01T01:00:00.000-04:00

Packing right now for our move and I found a folder of old writing that I have kept since I was a child. I thought I might share a few with you. The first one I wrote when I was 15 and I actually remember the assignment for it. We were given a saying in Creative Writing and asked to write something from it, making sure we use the phrase at least once. Mine was Birds of a feather, flock together.

Visitors

2011-07-31T14:13:00.006-04:00

Over the course of the two weeks while we were on vacation, we had a number of little furry and not so furry visitors. The kids loved it and I enjoyed taking some pictures of all the little animals. The first night we had a campfire, a large racoon emerged from the trees and tried to sit with us. James yelled at him and he scurried into the bushes only to reappear 2 minutes later with a "What?

An Interesting Dinner Conversation

2011-07-30T01:00:00.001-04:00

"Mom, did you know..." His eyes sparkle as he leans forward, his gaze fixed with mine over our dinner plates. "Did I know what bud?"My six year old leans even closer and I wonder if he is going to end up in his plate, "That sometimes two women can get married?"I pause slightly and then nod, "Yes, I did know that and two men can get married as well."His eyes grow large and he asks in a voice

The Call

2011-07-29T01:00:00.002-04:00

I hear you as I lie in my bed, the lonely trill that means you are close to the dock. I sigh, dawn has just arrived and I don't feel like getting out of the bed and walking down to the dock. I want to capture your beauty on film but couldn't you just visit me later in the day when I am better rested.As it is, I stumble out of the bed, search for my shoes and creep out of the house, fumbling with

The Hero Problem

2011-07-28T00:12:00.000-04:00

I have been reading a book lately that has been less than stellar in my mind but I keep reading, hoping that maybe the book will pick up and suddenly the wasted hours will seem like they were worth it. Unfortunately, I am about 15 pages in sight of the end and the climax is just being reached. From what I have read the climax will definitely be missing the big "wow" that it should have.Despite

The Lotus Part Two

2011-07-27T01:00:00.001-04:00

You drift there, alone amongst the leaves, almost overlooked in the dark water. The clouds cover the sun but yet you reach out your petals and grasp at the light that trickles through. You are like a ghost upon the water, your delicate beauty a bright spot upon the mind. I am drawn to you, wondering if today a new secret will cause the pond to ripple beneath you as it comes to the surface.Day

Laugh!

2011-07-26T00:16:00.000-04:00

You always sound so sad...The words ring through the telephone and I pause, frustration at the caller rearing its head. It is always that way when I talk to my mom. We have a hard past and while a part of me wants to overcome the feelings that still plague me, another part struggles with it.Usually, I am fine but then there is a moment when she says something that will make me bite my tongue and

Playing with the Camera

2011-07-25T01:00:00.000-04:00

Anyone who knows me knows that I love taking pictures. Over the course of 2 weeks, I took over 900 photos and while there are many that aren't worth saving, there were a few really nice gems among the trash.One of the things that I did while I was away was play around with a few of the settings trying to figure them out. It was fun but some of the shots really weren't that good. Anyway, here are

Walking with Ghosts

2011-07-24T01:00:00.000-04:00

The road that we turn onto dwindles down to a one lane dirt track and we glance around to make sure that we are on the right road. A sign up ahead, barely visible in the green expanse of the encroaching swamp, reads Umphraville with an arrow pointing off into the wilderness. We don't say anything as the van jumps and sinks over each bump and into each pothole in the road. "I guess they don't get

The Ol' Ghost Story

2011-07-23T01:00:00.001-04:00

"Who's going to tell the ghost story?"The eager voice of my 9 year old cries out the moment his mouth is clear of any marshmallows. I remain silent as James says, "Don't look at me, your mother is the writer."Two pairs of expectant eyes turn towards me and I sigh inwardly, staring into the flames as I try to ignore them. "I don't think you would like my stories," I mumble."Please, we can't have a

The Lotus: Part One

2011-07-22T01:00:00.000-04:00

You float there. Upon the still water, a silent beauty that holds so many secrets. I am enamoured of you, wondering what the kiss of your petal would feel like. Wondering what secrets you have hidden in the depths below you. Are you a nymph? Or are you merely a flower that heralds the mysteries of nature. You have become to me an obsession and I watch you every day, wondering if the sunlight of a

Day Two: McDonald’s Mine

2011-07-21T01:00:00.000-04:00

Although the plan of the vacation was to just sit and relax, I find it hard to do so. The second day, or rather the very first morning at the cottage, I was on edge. I was worried about a dozen things, wondering if I would relax at all and thankful that I had a few weeks to start to relax.Since I was so restless, I couldn’t bring myself to simply sit and watch the hours go by so we decided to

The Cottage

2011-07-20T01:45:00.000-04:00

If you didn't realize it from my last post, you will probably guess it from this one - I spent two weeks at a cottage during the beginning of July. It was a wonderful time and while I would have liked to have posted these while I was away, the lack of internet kept me from posting anything. Instead, I wrote while I was there and over the course of the next few weeks, I will share the photos and

The Drive

2011-07-19T09:40:00.003-04:00

The shrill cry echoed around the room making me squeeze my eyes even tighter. James shifted in his sleep, but continued to ignore each pulse of sound that speared into my brain. I really need a new alarm clock, I thought to myself like I do every morning I hear it. Opening my one eye, I peer at the red numbers – 3:15am. I sigh. My hand fumbles through the air as I try to press the snooze

Lost Souls, Chapter Two

2011-02-25T09:32:00.002-05:00